i know you can be overwhelmed and you can be underwhelmed but can you ever just be whelmed?-10 things i hate about you RIP Heath Ledger

as a simple request from my grandmother im writing a new post so that every time she opens the page she wont be forced to look at that nasty bubbling toes. its kind of like the jack johnson song bubbly toes. now thats a good one. but i think he was talking about something else other than frost bite...

things here have been going well. overwhelmed with school work, fundraising, and other extra curricular activities. and on top of that, i am also overwhelmed by the world.

i think the world is the sum of everything going on in my life and what is pulling down on me.

as for school work, most of it comes from my geography, global studies, and missions class. these classes have me studying individual countries as well as our own and the one i am preparing to go to this summer. the reading is overwhelming and hurts my heart often.

fundraising for romania is going not so well. this is yet another overwhelming object of my life. this trip was something i wanted to do entirely on my own. i didnt want to rely on parents for anything since i seem to rely on them for everything. and when i say rely on them i really mean paying for everything. i wanted this to be my own things. one single thing i could do for myself. we are participating in a lot of fundraisers but when you split this money among 10 girls, it all gets chopped up into smaller portions. currently we are doing a change drive (which personally i believe is very ineffective.) who is going to go out of their way to go to the RA rooms and put loose change into a jar. i am also selling fair trade coffee from africa. we sell it for 10 dollars but get six. this is a good deal, but what college student is going to spend money to buy this? i know i wouldnt. other girls in my group are from colorado so they can go to their hometowns and sell but i dont have that advantage. besides this there are other fundraisers were doing spaghetti dinners and such. but nothing that is going to get me 900 more dollars in two weeks. please note that this is not a plea for money, but me venting on my blog. dont take it to heart.

as for extra curricular activities i dont know if i mentioned that i would be working with a refugee family. i am leading a group of 5 other students that are helping a refugee family from burma. we are working with them helping them to learn english and get used to american customs such as riding the bus or grocery shopping. they dont speak any english. i am so excited for this opportunity but so nervous at the same time. tomorrow is the first day that we will be meeting with an interpreter and the family to get to know them, but after that there will be no interpreter. im praying earnestly that god will use this experience to help me grow more than anything.

also an extra curricular is a book im reading its called A Long Way Gone: Memoir of a Boy Soldier. This book is about a guy who is from Sierra Leone and is reflecting on his youth dealing with rebels and loosing his family, village, among so many other terrible things. but it is a passionate book.

so as you can see i am overwhelmed by the world. its not affecting me directly but at the same time it is. from this experience of how much i passionately care about this planet and its cultures and its people i feel i have started to learn on what im called to do with my life. i dont know specifically what that is, but i know that it will slowly, or maybe quickly, start to unfold right in front of me.

what if god was one of us

welcome to your STEP moms house.

this is what happens when your RA gets fired for not being able to make it down a 14er fast enough at -30 degrees and is forced to COHABITATE with a boy in a tent on the mountain so she didnt freeze to death. as a result she also received severe frost bite so she cant run for three months or be outside for long periods of time.

thanks to this "kush the dush" forced her to reside due to her "terrible" offenses. so now he is asking us to cooperate calmly while we "process" this "transition".

so now welcome to your step moms house. heres some pictures to back up the goodness.

stretching, flailing, and punching

last night i had a self attack. there i lay sleeping at about five in the morning peaceful and calm. dreaming of sugarplums and who knows what else. all of a sudden either i was stretching, flailing my arms, or just felt the plain need to punch myself in the face. my cast hit my nose and the next thing i knew i was awake and in pain and my nose was bleeding everywhere. i got out of bed and raced to the bathroom where i spent the next ten minutes trying to get it to stop. gross.

wallowing

i fractured my wrist. yes sir i did. my entry will be short since its kind of difficult to type with this fatty velcro brace on. it happened while i was snowboarding. so thats always fun. at least it wasnt from tripping or falling down stairs. so i have to find another doctor when i get to colorado who will take care of me. the chip isnt too bad and im not in a whole lot of pain, more so just sad. thats all for now.